"To everyone who's hurting, to those who've had enough.
to all the undeserving, that should cover all of us...
Please do not let go, I promise there is hope.
Help is on the way. He's come to save the day.
What I've learned in my life, one thing greater than my strife,
is His grasp...
So Hold Fast."
These are some of the lyrics to a song, titled Hold Fast, by Mercyme. This song has ministered to me, when admittedly, reading scripture seems difficult. Sure, there are times when reading the Word of God, I feel like it doesn't apply to me or that it is still a far off pipe dream. But that, in itself is a lie.
I am finally feeling like I am coming out of a bad dream. A dream that at times, has appeared more like a nightmare. Since November of 2013, I have had to undergo hip surgery, an emergency appendectomy and lastly a month ago, a total hysterectomy. Recovery and starting over again and again can get a little long in the tooth. By this time last year, I had already logged a couple hundred miles on my road bike. To date, my sweet bike, (her name is Joy) has not seen the light of day since October. OCTOBER! Here in the mitten shaped peninsula we had a terrible winter. I know the majority of the country did too, but this isn't about them... sadly, it's about me.
From many chronic sports injuries, my wee little identity and ego have taken a beating. Weight gain, some mild depression and more tears than I could imagine have filled many days for me since winter time. But, that is over.
I have decided that it's time to deal with the cards that I have been dealt and keep moving forward. "Meet the Robinson's" is one of my most favorite Disney movies. However, it was not one of the more popular ones. It tells the story of a sweet boy, who is up for adoption and every time he tries to impress his potential new parents, something goes wrong. Later, you discover why... but suffice to say, that the theme is "KEEP MOVING FORWARD!" Even when your path has been full of troubles. Quitting is not an option. I have had family members quit on life, and believe me, it ain't pretty. No, I can't quit, but I can pick myself up again, align my thoughts with The Lord's truth about me and move forward.
God instructs me to move forward. No, okay, He doesn't say those exact words, but in 2 Corinthians 4:16-18, the apostle Paul tells us "Therefore, do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us and eternal glory that far outweights them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. Since what is since is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal."
I have begun work on my Bachelors in Holistic Christian Health and Nutrition. Something that I have felt led to do for a long time, and only now have decided to act. I desire to be a Holisitic Nutritionist who will combine coaching with the word of God. I want to help other women manage smart choices with their health, while learning how to fuel their temple with clean food.
Dreams of assisting other women with their physical goals and lifestyle are still dreams, but they are becoming clearer. Daily I pray for increased wisdom and the ability to truly understand what I am learning. I need to carve out time for God, my husband and my teenage boys and the obvious stuff when running a home. However, schooling and physical therapy are also on the calendar.
Life style changes are hard. Becoming the person you know God has designed you to be, is hard. Keep good friends around you that are like minded and press forward. Tell them your fears, plans and failures. Allow them to pick you up with God's truth when you need it. Because, surely you do that for them.
Got a dream? Working through a disappointment? Think God has forgotten you? Think again.
The book of Psalms gives us plenty of references, promises and reminders that God watches over us and our lives. Psalm 121 tells us that "The Lord will watch over my coming and going both now and forevermore."
I shared that sometimes scripture doesn't feel like it applies to me. That is true. It doesn't feel like it does. But that feeling is a lie. All scripture is God breathed and applies to me. I have to choose to apply it. I have to choose to personalize it and make it sound like a loud gong in my head. No one else can make that happen for me.
Wherever you are, just because it's mid May and the year is flying by... go for it! New diet? Go for it! New job? Schooling? Training for a race? Starting a new job? Time with God? Relationship issues? Go for it! You're worth it. Today is a great day to share your goals with a good friend. Start with God... He calls us friends. He has chosen you to do many great things for the Kingdom today. I'm ready, are you?